EDITORS NOTE: MARCH
Isn't it kinda cool and ironic that MARCH is Women's Herstory Month? I say that because the word MARCH literally means to walk along public roads in an organized procession to protest about something and or to proceed or advance inexorably. And, isn't that exactly what we as women do? MARCH on. Forward. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, but always forward. No matter the shit we go through, our internal battles with ourselves (and boy do we have a zillion of them on the daily), our ups and our downs we just keep... swimming. Sometimes floating, but fuck it we keep going. Right?
Never have I realized how intricate I am more than now. And I know that 63% of that is because I am a woman. It's a love hate relationship. That's the honest truth. At least as I write this. Some days are amazing, I'm high off of life and how good my face looks with no makeup on it. Freckles saying hi, curls being curly etc etc. Other days I'm like a crying new born trying to figure out what it is that I want... is it food? is it sleep? GIRL, just tell me!
I sound crazy. But I know I'm not. One- because my therapist (shout out to my amazing Dominican therapist) tells me I'm not crazy, and two- because I've heard many women say the same thing to me or on social media (so to me still, just not directly). And I'm here to tell you, or rather serve as a reminder, that you're not the only one trying to figure it out.
You're not the only one trying to understand your needs and how to properly meet said needs. Needs that can be as big as taking a vacation or as small as having enough time to enjoy a hot shower and shave your underarms (true story). The older we get the busier we are. When I was a teen, I was seriously preoccupied with school and boys. It's all over my journals. That's it. And somehow I thought my plate was full (HA!).
Now my plate is def full, enough that I sometimes want to run away and throw it back in the oven. I have days when I'm sitting around having existential conversations with myself... wtf is happening? where is this going? THIS meaning all of it. Everything I'm working on, everything I'm trying to build... ya know? But I'm choosing this path as much as it has chosen me. And running away might work for like a few days ... but ultimately forward I must go.
Let me reel it back in. I'm sharing this truth with you because this March, I want to encourage you to keep growing and keep pursuing. And to hash it out with yourself when you're having those internal battles, don't be scared to get scrappy. Being a multi-dimensional woman is not easy. It really isn't. And no matter how put together the girl next to you seems to be, she's dealing with or dealt with your same feelings. That's the beauty in being woman, we've been there, we get it. So don't just sit there and drown in your thoughts, you're a swimmer boo! TALK. ABOUT. IT. Or just write about it... writing about this already makes me feel better. So in conclusion, I have some of the answers and when I don't have them I let the universe do what it's gonna do. This month I'm practicing the simple act of reminding myself to: live in the present, slow down and control the controllable. The rest is really out of my hands.
Ok! Let me get back to plotting away, we have a brand to build! Thank you for your continued support and love - it does not go unnoticed. Believe that.
peace & light
ps- when all else fails, remember "nevertheless she persisted"
my feelings were re-enacted by Gina, whom one day in the not so far away future will be my friend ... naming it! claiming it!