Dating: K.

The most sinister, maddening, oh-hell- nah letter in the English alphabet is the “K”. What began as a seemingly innocent “Okay” turned into a flimsy-ass “OK” and somehow got ground down into a single- syllable so messed up it has to power to destroy friendships, relationships, marriages-- even families.

Below is an example from a recent text fight with my significant other:

Me: My intent was to have a couple nights of sleeping in our own beds, not taking a complete break from our relationship. But, if that’s what you need let me know.

S/O: K.

K-with- a-period was all it took to send me spinning into a grammatically incorrect thread of angry texts, to which she replied with another, “K” with a damn period! Call my sister a skank, tell me my eyebrows are uneven, threaten the life of Beyonce’s unborn children, but drop a ‘K’ on the iPhone 6S screen and you can get these hands AND feet.

But, it got me thinking…why is a single letter such a power move in the textversation universe? I think it’s because K-with- a-period is the ultimate diss. Let’s break it down: 

The 'K.'

How it makes you feel: You're hurt. You just spilled your heart and soul out into that little blue text bubble. Your expectation is that he or she will read your message and feel your pain and console you with a sweet, “Aww Bae, you know you still my cinnamon apple”. But no. All you get is the stupid ‘’K”. It kills because your feelings are seemingly being disregarded. The dismissal makes you feel diminutive and unimportant, like a stray sew-in track left in the street after a catfight. It’s a low point.

How to handle it: Your Bae has clearly decided to let Satan use him a vessel for evil, so all you can do is give the drama to God. Seriously, don’t respond. That’s what he wants you to do and when you do, he’ll just keep ignoring you, and unfortunately “He said ‘K’ is not going to stand up in court during the assault trial. Rather than focus your anger into a carefully crafted reply, put your energy into things that build your esteem back up, like a dance class, cooking a new recipe or writing a blog post.

The 'Period'

How it makes you feel: You got knocked the f*** out (textually, of course)! How dare this scrub shut the conversation down when you were on a roll. You were just about to tell him his momma can’t cook when he hit you with the K-bomb AND then added a period at the end to make sure you knew your time was up. The level of finality that comes along with that punctuation mark is infuriating, but the real problem is that you’ve lost control of the situation and you’re temporarily too emotional to cope.

How To Handle it: Congratulations…You played yourself. You could have dropped a ‘K’ two texts ago, but you had to get your next thought out. Now you appear weak and overly emotional and your partner gets to walk away the winner. So, K, you’re no longer in control of the situation, but you are still in control of yourself. Take a minute to breath (positivity in, dumb shit out). Then go do an activity that gives you back the control you feel like you lost. Go to the gym and work out harder than ever, paint your nails, draw on your eyebrows for the GODS! By the time you’re done your face is looking like a Kylie Jenner Lip Kit and Bae has already text you twice to patch things up.

So yes, Bae tried it, but don’t let K-with- a-period stop you from flourishing. It may be the end of your convo, but it could be the start of some great work on yourself.

:) KB

image source: seagullhair