i hope yall got something out of my dating post, i have stories for days... many of which sound like i made them up {but i didn't - bc i ain't neva lie}. now it's time for my final installment in this three part series! gather round' and let me save you a little bit of time ...

                                                                             come hea

                                                                             come hea

i'm gonna sound extra lame... BUT! save your money. open up a savings account and PUT YOUR MONEY IN THERE. here's a little story that will give you some perspective: when i was 25 i lost my job, and if it weren't for the money i had saved -- i would have been majorly fucked {like when you thought you got away with something only to get your ass whooped with a leather belt in the middle of a shower}. that little bit of money held me down for a few months because my unemployemnt had not kicked in {and it didn't until two wks prior to me getting another job offer} ... you ever tried to make a dollar out of 15 cents? no? well i have. so stop buying BS you don't need and put those coins in the bank

live within your means. i have known many people who wanted to live a lifestyle they couldn't afford and would rather be broke just to keep up appearances. i am thankful i've never been that girl. mom never could afford the new jordans for me in hs {i also did not want them... timbs tho, a girl wanted some timbos} so i learned to rock payless shoes like they were the new yeezy's. and that mentality has carried into my 20s. i have no shame in saying "sorry not in my budget, ill catch it on snapchat my friend" 

do care about your lifestyle. don't turn into the person that runs into an old college buddy and responds with "same old sht different day" when asked: how you been?! --- that response is so depressing. i literally want to jump in front of traffic when i hear that. LIVE YOUR FUCKING LIFE! PURSUE YOUR PASSIONS! just because you have a job you're not fond of does not mean you should go home every night to mope. take a class, learn to cook, volunteer - pick something!

learn to co-exist with others like a civilized human being. i've lived with all sorts of women and i can say i was always pleasant to be around {assuming this since they are all still my good friends}

say yes more, the universe will reward you 

travel. travel. travel. travel. repeat.... i've traveled to a lot of places with a lot of people, including by myself {twice}. i highly recommend traveling alone at least once in your life. you learn about a different version of yourself and you get to make worldly friends and do worldly things {remember my point about being bigger than your block?}

find a good obgyn and make her your bff - great obgyn's are the true unicorns of this world

you spend most of your time at work and in your bed. invest in a good mattress {you're welcome}

if you feel like you're being defensive, then you probably are. it took me years to realize that and i wish that switch would have gone off sooner... it would have saved me a lot of turmoil {also having an attitude for no reason isn't cute, don't box yourself out of opportunities and or relationships because of it}

sometimes you need to have a fall out so that things could get pieced back together properly. and sometimes you just gotta make peace with the things that no longer serve a purpose in your life. i had to learn that just because you love someone doesn't mean you have to like them. and that just because you don't like them now, does not mean you wont like them later. {that was a lot to take in huh?} in other words: going through the motions with family members and friendships is part of growing, so let your spirit stretch and grow

paying bills sucks. it will always suck.

                           me every month when i gotta pay sally mae...

                           me every month when i gotta pay sally mae...

invest in a wardrobe that you love. i'm a strong believer that your confidence is attached to your style and how you present yourself to the world. as someone who has styled people, i know that the right pair of jeans or dress goes a long way {also the right bra - take care of the girls}!

{ey, being passive aggressive ain't cute either}

if you don't have many girl friends then maybe you should figure out what part you play in that conundrum. girl power is a real thing and it will make your life much more richer if you get yourself a supportive squad { don't get together and hate on other girls tho, that sht is wack and jlo agrees}

learn to spend sometime with yourself. i'm pretty sure i'm this independent because i am an only child. however, you too can be the girl that goes to a concert/bar/party/play by herself. taking yourself out on a date is NECESSARY {ring ring - this is you calling you}

my final piece of advice is this {and this is what mom told me when i turned 20}: think of your 20s as a wet towel, twist the shit out of that towel until there is nothing left... aka enjoy it and don't be so hard on yourself

xo catch you guys on the next wave #yaribx30

                                                                                                         yari out

                                                                                                         yari out



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