Happy August MOB! I know a lot of you are thinking, where did the summer go? And I have an answer for you. IT IS STILL HERE. Summer doesn’t officially end until September 21st, so you have plenty of time to catch a tan and a bae if that is what your heart desires. I have a few things I wanted to share with you in this Editor’s note in the event that you were feeling the same as I am.

I was recently in Nashville to receive an award. This was during the weekend where two mass shootings happened back to back. One in El Paso TX and another in Dayton OH. I thought to myself this is absolutely horrific. Everything happening in the news is horrific. Is like this country has a massive disease that is oozing puss and it won’t stop. I was trying to remain present and enjoy my trip and my award. But I couldn’t help be feel on edge. I felt on edge when one uber driver pulled up in a pick up truck and was playing some serious country music. I felt on edge when another uber driver asked me “are you American” as an opening line for conversation. And I absolutely felt on edge as I sat at a very well lit bar waiting for my friend to arrive and all I could do was look around and around for anyone who might be suspicious. It is not okay that we feel this way. That same feeling has came over me multiple times in crowded movie theaters as I search for the exit sign and plan for an escape… it’s also a constant when my fiance drives and we leave NYC. I hate that this is our reality because I know it doesn’t have to be this way. I know politicians have the power to change policies and make things better, but they choose to hide behind the constitution. It is repulsive. I also know that so much of this has happened that it’s left me paralyzed, and while I have posted about some things, I have not made big actions. It feels overwhelming and crushing. I have quietly prayed at home and reminded myself that showing up and feeling joy is a tiny revolution in of itself. I know that is not fully enough and that I need to do more. I acknowledge that. Below is a video that really drove things home for me.

This has been a strange year so far. It has been full of so many wins and so many difficulties. I recently shared on my instagram this truth because I don’t ever want to present myself as something that I am not. I think we can get caught up in so much stuff, and I want the people who see me to see me as human as they see themselves. I am so grateful for the blessings this season has brought me, and I know big things are coming my way, but nothing moves without growth and growth sometimes feels like a massive tectonic shift. In other words painful and isolating. Despite that, knowing I have my partner, friends, family and a therapist to turn to reminds me that I have all the resources to turn things around when I feel I am driving down the wrong road. If you’ve ever felt like this or are feeling this way right now, remember you always have someone to turn to even if you feel like you don’t. In the meantime I encourage you to continue to be kind to yourself, to cry when you need to and find moments for joy. I’m currently loving the show ‘Brain Games’ because of the way it shows us how the brain works. As someone who has anxiety and deals with rumination learning how the mind works and ways to change thought patterns is helpful.

Now that you’re all caught up with me, I want to talk about August on theGIRLMOB. This month’s theme is titled ‘Blurred Lines’ — we are focusing on all things sex, pleasure, intimacy and relationships. Something we see talked about much more now, but I am sure many of us are still figuring out. We also have some awesome interviews with women of color we should be supporting and on the lookout for. Lastly, we’ll be sharing details about our events this September, which includes a series of classes with Overthrow Boxing. Time to let off some steam and increase those endorphins. Less excuses, more progress.

Love & Light,

Yari B